You skinny/average sized girls. Just. Enough with calling yourself fat when you know you aren’t. You obviously aren’t when you flaunt how tiny you are all over the place. On top of that, you’ve got boys all over you. You feed off of that attention to keep your self-esteem high. But honestly, you know you’re attractive. “When guys say a girl is hot right in front of you. Ouch.” Like, wtf? You’re beautiful just the way you are. And you’ve probably been around those guys enough to the point where they’re used to you. That doesn’t mean you’re not attractive yourself.
Like… c’mon. You’re not afraid to wear nice clothing. Don’t tell me you are, because I take all the chances I have to hide myself. Baggy clothing, sweaters. I rarely ever walk out my front door without a cardigan to hide my arms. Even in shorts, I’ve felt and still feel self-conscious. So stop. If you’re calling yourself fat, then what would that make me? I used to rarely ever think about how I looked. But this constant “I’m so fat.” or “She’s so fat.”… I can’t help but start to feel that insecurity I shouldn’t even be feeling in the first place.
I don’t care if you’re just joking around and you think that I would take that shit lightly - but I don’t. I don’t take it lightly. I take jokes about how I look, how I act and everything else targeting who I am as a person, to heart. “You should lose some weight then.” “Oh, what size do you wear? Large? Extra large?” “Aw, you’re so fat now. You used to be skinny.” “Oh, you’re so fat now. Don’t be fat. It doesn’t look good. Stop eating so much.” Honestly, there’s that fucking line you all need to learn how to not cross. So what if I gained some weight? That doesn’t mean I’m fucking fat.
I’ve been through a lot of shit and stress, so of course I’m going to resort to comfort food. And as for all of your guys’ criticism, you think that makes me feel better? Just fuck. It just makes me feel worse about myself.
What’s sad about this all is that no one has told me that I looked fine just the way I am. Screw these thoughts. I hate how they’re starting to get into my head when I don’t want them to. Screw this brain of mine for letting this hurt me. And people wonder why I’m starting to grow quiet around everyone. Just shut up.